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take one woman with low self esteem, but quite good hair
add one moronic illness
stir in some medication which causes hair to fall out
mix it all up and this is what you get...


Thursday, March 30, 2006

Crossed purposes 

A textual conversation between Big and Anx

Background:

Big and Anx live in Town X. Anx works in Town Y, which is about halfway between Town X and City Z.

Big: Fancy going to see The Proposition tonight?
Anx: What time is it on, love?
Big: 18:30
Anx [thinks]:I finish work at 17:30. It takes me about half an hour to get back to Town X but the cinema is on the way back into town from the motorway, so I should get there with time to spare.
Anx: I'd have to go straight there from work, but it's possible
Big: Of course you would. Do you fancy it? I am just thinking that we will not get such a chance later in the week with running and Thin Lizzy
Anx: Okay, let's do it. Can you get to the cinema on your own or should I pick you up?
Big: I will find out. I should be okay but will let you know
Big: See you there at 18:30? I should get going now.
Anx [looks at watch][thinks]: Why is he leaving now? He's only a couple of miles away...
Anx: Are you walking?
Big: To the station, yes, then the train. I just want to make sure I get there in good time.
Anx [thinks] The train? Admittedly, the cinema is alongside the railway line, but there's no station any nearer to the cinema than Town X station, so unless he's thinking of throwing himself out of the window en route, I can't see how a train is going to help. Why? Why would he be getting the train?

*furrows brow*
*scratches chin*
*racks brain*

...

Anx: Hang on, are you going to the cinema in City Z?
Big: Yes. Sorry, I did not mention that, did I?

Anx [thinks]: No, my dear, you did not...




Up until a few weeks ago, we ONLY ever went to the cinema in City Z. I am a self-confessed cinema snob, preferring independent, arthouse cinemas to the faceless multiplexes of suburbia. However, we have softened recently, mainly for practical reasons, and braved the "Odious" (as I call it) so that weeknight cinema trips do not have to involve quite so much travelling time.

So my initial assumption that we would be going to the Odious was understandable. As was Big's: that we would go to City Z.

I can just imagine us both standing in our respective cinemas, wondering where on earth the other one was...

Just goes to show: never assume...


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